Tuesday, December 14, 2010
Sunday, October 24, 2010
A verse

Monday, October 18, 2010
Sex?
Saturday, October 2, 2010
Ajj Raam te babar hasde ne
Friday, October 1, 2010
Wednesday, August 11, 2010
Monday, August 9, 2010
Dil Dosti etc...
Monday, June 28, 2010
Mornings
Tuesday, June 1, 2010
The new nurturing grounds for Urdu in India
Friday, May 21, 2010
Oh that's so stereotypical
Wednesday, April 7, 2010
'As' you like it
Don't
Tuesday, March 30, 2010
Khayaali Pulao
Tuesday, March 16, 2010
Original Julka Chess Jokes
Thursday, March 4, 2010
Holy Shit!
Warning:If you are of the 'pious'/tight ass variety, I would suggest not going further.You have been warned!
Since Big Gs are in such a huge demand everywhere, licenses for production were given to different companies, and needless to say competition breeds innovation. Today Gs come in more forms than ever before, and the mind boggling variety can be confusing for anyone. Hence, for your convenience, I shall take the various models one by one
First in the queue, we have company 'H'. Company H was founded 3500 years ago by nobody.It is quite a unique firm, offering 33 million variations(and counting) of their flagship product.Their Gs come in all shapes and sizes, and can often be custom built from scratch. The company is administered by 'Pun'dits, known for their acidic wit, especially towards customers belonging to the 'Shoodra' category, whom they generally shoo away. The firm has a flexible bad debts policy, and a person can write off a bad loan by taking a bath in the 'panga' river, named so because taking a bath in it's 'pristine industrial waters' often amounts to taking a 'panga'.Customers follow the policy of 'karMa', inspired by Deewar's famous dialogue "Mere paas Ma Hai!".
Moving on to our second company, we have the firm 'I', founded by some fellow called 'Mo'. The company has labelled their product as 'A', which stands for awesome!, which is to be spoken in a Barney Stinson accent. The company has been mired in some controvery these days, owing to the behaviour of their 'WahaB' division, which insists in killing customers of other firms known as 'InfyDels', who are nothing but employees of Infosys and Dell.They also kill some of their own followers called 'Shee-a' who they think are much too effeminate.When happy, the WahaB s sing their anthem "Oh Sama!" which invigorates them instantly. On the bright side, customers of I are promised equal treatment and provision for charity are provided. Followers are also adept at arts and crafts, which brings them a lot of fame.Initially the company faced some issues of synchronisation of 'A' with products of other firms, but the issue has been since resolved after the introduction of the 'Sufi' upgrade.
Now we come to a much smaller group known as 'Judes' (Inspired from the Beatles' hit single "Hey Jude!"). Although they are a small scale company, they have made their mark in the financial world. The company ran into some trouble in the 1930's when a madcap known as 'Shitler' nearly succedded in destroying them. However the Judes have since resurged and are now quite influential and powerful. The Judes ran into some land ownership issues when they usurped the land of the 'Palace Teens' and the two have been fighting ever since. Luckily, they have an Uncle Sam who helps them regularly by shutting up anyone who shouts "Human Rights!".
Besides these biggies,we also have smaller firms 'Sickism' and 'Duddism'. Sickism was founded by people who were sick of the products of 'H' and 'I'.Followers of sickism call themselves 'Seekhs', out of their love for seekh kebabs.Seekhs are also fond of dancing and that explains their motto "Wahe Guru Ji Da Salsa,Wahe Guru ji di Fateh".Dudism was founded in India, got exported to China who then eventually put an embargo on it. Customers of Duddism are often confused since they expect their product 'Big G' but are only delivered a bunch of CDs by this band called 'Nirvana'.Followers often become the victims of road accidents since they are supposed to walk on the 'middle path'.
So to sum it up, this is all there is to this big bazaar.If you thought I was poking fun at your choices, you are absolutely right! Any inappropriateness is seriously unregretted!
Tuesday, February 23, 2010
Just a thought...
Monday, February 22, 2010
Gardish
Tuesday, February 9, 2010
Superheroes
Thursday, February 4, 2010
Naqsh Faryadi!
You may have noticed that I ve changed my blog title to 'Naqsh Faryadi' and I presume that most of you would be wondering,why?
Well,'Naqsh faryadi' is an allusion to the first verse of ghalib's urdu diwan
Naqsh faryadi hai kis ki shokhi-e-tehreer ka,
Kaghazi hai pairhan har paikar-e-tasveer ka
I m sure that raised more questions than answers!...Here's the translation & the explanation...
Translation:
Against whose playful writings are the words complainants?
Made of paper attire is the countenance of every image
Well,the two key words are 'naqsh' and 'faryadi'.Naqsh means 'words'/inscriptions and 'faryadi' means a plaintiff/complainant.So it's the words who are complaining against the nature of this universe,asking why was it created in such a mischievous fashion.And that sums up the very essence of this 'blog'.....
If you want a detailed explanation of this hauntingly beautiful verse,i suggest
visiting Fran Pritchett's link....it'll be worth the effort
Friday, January 29, 2010
list of things that might go with my generation
43)Alif Laila
44)Kite flying(patang udana)
45)Trump cards
46)Bante/Kanche:Marbles
47)Geete(game with a ball and stones)
48)Getting excited at weddings,and tring to hog the limelight by sitting between the bride and the groom(Neetu,mind it!)
49)G.I.Joe
50)Thaapi waala Cricket
51)Pen fight,book cricket,name place animal thing
52)Thinking kids were a result of an elaborate pooja,where 'bhagwanji' would come and gift them(now i know why old people are so religious!)
53)Wondering why this pooja would always happen after marriage
54)"Girlfriend boyfriend haw haw"
55)Manual rickshaws
Sunday, January 17, 2010
Monday, January 11, 2010
I won't be
There is no love,
Where I won't be.
Go away from this web,
Come meet me there,
Where I won't be.
Stop hiding from the mirror,
You can't see that reflection,
Where I won't be.
Beyond here,Beyond there,
Beyond beyond,
Where I won't be.
Sunday, January 10, 2010
The Curious Case of the Aam Aadmi
politicians say it and we,the 'aam aadmi' say
it(rather enthusiastically).That the common man,or
the 'aam aadmi'is peace loving, honest, secular,
and so on.I find this notion rather absurd and
fanciful.To say that the actions of an average
human being are governed by the principles of
justice, peace, or whatever that keeps our society
stable is a bit like indulging in collective
narcissism.True, our society, for the most part
appears to be a stable place with a semblance of
order in it.However our motivations behind
maintaining such an apparent stability are
unfortunately, not so lofty.
The most dominant instinct that governs a living organism
is survival. A lion eats a deer because of it,and
rhizobium bacteria(if that's the name)
symbiotic-ally lives on legume roots because of
it.The same instinct produces two contrasting
actions.In the first case,it results in the
domination of the hunter over the hunted and in the
second case,co-operation.
Although it's been a long time since we had to
fight tigers,the survival instinct in the human
being takes root in form of self-interest.This self
interest takes form of different abstractions like
financial survival,social survival etc...So,if this
self interest motive favours, or rather seems to
favour peace, we are peaceful. The moment it
favours aggression, we go back to our
warmongering.How else would one explain
abominations like the caste system,and female
exploitation.The males thought, our self interest
is served well with keeping female empowerment in
check and the bourgeois think that having a
perpetual army of servants serves their needs.If the
aam aadmi had any belief in his so called ideals,
the caste system would have been a relic of the
past.
Same goes for secularism/communalism.We are
secular when we are dependent on the other
community but turn into communalists when it suits
us.The same person who has reservations about
having a Muslim/Christian neighbour because of his
'non vegetarian' habits won't bat an eyelid when
he's in America/Europe, because come on, dollars
can make you forgive cow slaughter.
It's quite obvious that the self interest motive is
governed by the dynamics of power.As they say,
jiski laathi uski bhains. Power is the biggest
justification for any cause. From the level of the
individual to the nation, everything is governed by
power. Britain appeased Hitler when it suited
them,but the moment their survival was in question,
they realized the tyrant that he was.The Jews,the
most unfortunate victims of the Holocaust didn't
bat an eyelid while displacing the
Palestinians.Injustice is an accepted norm
as long as it doesn't affect us or those around us.
One might think that I am very pessimistic about
humanity and the world in general.Alas, you are
wrong.I have faith, but not in our good but in our
love for our self interest.If manipulated properly,
the same interest which divides us, can unite
us.Our society can only be the 'better' place that
we want to it when we start believing that our self
interest is dependent on the self interest of
others.After all, it was Jim Carrey in his film Ace
Ventura who said,"It is the mucus which binds us".
How true.
Tuesday, January 5, 2010
Just...
Just stop this madness
I am not in wait of dawn,
Just light away this darkness
I have no faith in truth,
Just remove this falseness
I don't expect the universe,
Just fill into this nothingness
I don't desire union,
Just cure my loneliness
I am the swirling dervish,
Just absolve me of existence.